You're going through the motions of your life, but something feels off. You can't quite put your finger on it, but you know that there's more to life than what you're currently experiencing. You feel like you're living someone else's life – a life that Society has told you that you should live. But is that what you really want?
Deep down, you know the answer is no. You want to live your life authentically – but you're not sure how to go about it. Where do you even start?
Does this sound familiar?
Luckily, you've come to the right place. In this article, we'll explore what it means to live as your authentic self, as well as the benefits of doing so. We'll also cover some common obstacles that stand in the way of authenticity, and provide some tools to help you on your journey to becoming your true self.
So if you're ready to start living life on your own terms, read on. It's time to discover your authentic self.
Defining Authenticity
What is authenticity?
The dictionary defines authenticity as “the quality of being true to oneself or to the original version.” When it comes to living authentically, this means being true to who you are – not who you think you should be, or who others want you to be. It's about being true to yourself, and living a life that is authentic and real to you.
It's about embracing your unique quirks and characteristics, and living in accordance with your values and morals – even if they differ from the mainstream.
It's about being brave enough to be your true self, even if that means standing out from the crowd.
It's about choosing actions, beliefs, and opinions that are true to you, not your conditioning.
Why is it important to live authentically?
Now that we've explored what authenticity is, let's take a look at why it's so important.
One of the main reasons why authenticity is important is because it allows you to live a life that is true to you. And when you're living a life that aligns with your values and beliefs, you're likely to experience greater happiness and satisfaction.
When we are living our authentic lives, we are connected to our true selves and thus to our true source of happiness and fulfillment.
Living an authentic life can help us to feel more connected to our true selves. When we are living as our authentic selves, we are more likely to experience a sense of connection and wholeness.
And finally, we are also more likely to attract people and experiences into our lives that are in alignment with who we really are, who are supportive and accepting of us, and who will help us to grow and reach our full potential. So living authentically is not only the key to a fulfilling life, but it is also the key to attracting more love, joy, and abundance into our lives.
In contrast, living a life that is inauthentic – or living someone else's version of what they believe is the right way to live – can lead to feelings of dissatisfaction and unhappiness. When we try to be someone we're not, we end up living a false life that isn't true to who we are. This can lead to feelings of emptiness and disconnection.
For more on why living authentically is important, read What is Your Authentic Self and Why is it Important.
What are the benefits of becoming your true self?
There are many benefits that come from living as your authentic self. Some of these benefits include:
- A life of meaning and purpose: When you're living authentically, you're more likely to be doing things that you're passionate about. And when your life has meaning and purpose, you're more likely to feel fulfilled.
- Improved relationships: One of the main benefits of authenticity is improved relationships. When you're being your true self, people are more likely to respond positively to you. They may even be drawn to you because of your uniqueness.
- Greater happiness and satisfaction: As we mentioned before, living an authentic life is likely to lead to greater happiness and satisfaction. This is because you're doing things that align with your values and beliefs, and that make you feel good.
- Positive impact: Living authentically allows you to make a positive impact on the world around you, by being an authentic role model for others. When you're living your truth, you inspire others to do the same.
- Sense of freedom: When you're being your true self, you're free to be who you are without worrying about what other people think. This can lead to a sense of freedom and liberation.
- Increased confidence and self-esteem: When you're living authentically, you're more likely to feel confident and have a healthy self-esteem. This is because you're not comparing yourself to others or trying to be someone you're not.
So now that we know what authenticity is and why it's important, let's take a look at how to live an authentic life...
The Journey to Authenticity
Becoming Aware of Who You Are
The first step to living an authentic life is becoming aware of who you are.
So often, we get caught up in the day-to-day grind and forget about what truly matters to us. We allow other people's opinions and expectations to dictate how we live our lives, instead of following our own hearts. But if we want to live a life that is rich and fulfilling, we need to reconnect with our authentic selves.
We need to find out what makes us happy and what we are passionate about. We need to find out why we are the way we are, and if our actions and behaviors are based on our beliefs or if they were influenced by someone else. We need to figure out if the things we fear are based on truth or if they are a trauma response.
This means taking the time to get to know yourself – your values, your beliefs, your passions, your quirks. Only then can we start living a life that is true to ourselves.
One way is to spend time alone, in silence, and allow yourself to just be. Another way is to journal, and explore your thoughts, opinions, and feelings on paper. You can spend time alone in nature, without any distractions. This will allow you to connect with your thoughts and feelings and get in touch with your innermost desires. You can also talk to a therapist or counselor, who can help you to understand yourself better. Additionally, there are many personality tests and quizzes available online that can give you some insights into your personality type.
Accepting yourself for who you are
The second step to becoming your true self and living an authentic life is accepting yourself for who you are. This includes all of your flaws, quirks, and imperfections. It means accepting yourself even if you don't meet other people's standards or expectations. It means recognizing that you are enough, just as you are.
One way to start accepting yourself is to list out all of your positive qualities, both physical and personality traits. This will help you to remember that you are more than just your flaws, and get you to focus on your positive qualities.
Additionally, try to focus on your strengths and accomplishments, rather than your weaknesses. This will help you to have a more positive view of yourself.
Another way to accept yourself is to treat yourself with kindness and compassion. Make an effort to be kinder to yourself. This means being gentle with yourself, both emotionally and physically. Practice positive self talk - talk to yourself the way you would talk to a friend. Be patient with yourself, and cut yourself some slack.
Forgive yourself for your mistakes and misplaced expectations. Recognize that everyone makes mistakes, that we all have flaws and imperfections, and that you are imperfect and perfectly human.
Lastly, it's important to build a support system of people who love and accept you for who you are. These people will be a source of strength and encouragement when you are struggling to accept yourself.
If this is a hard step for you, these journal prompts will help you build up your self love so that you can start accepting yourself, flaws and all.
Living in alignment with your values and beliefs
Living in alignment with your values and beliefs means that your actions match up with what you believe in, and that you are living your life in a way that is consistent with your values. This may mean changing some of your habits, and making some lifestyle changes. It's also important to be honest with yourself, and to stand up for what you believe in - even when it's not popular or easy.
To live in alignment with your values and beliefs, you first need to know what they are. Spend some time thinking about what is important to you, and what you believe in. Once you have a good understanding of your values and beliefs, you can start making choices that align with them.
For example, if one of your values is family, you might make choices that involve spending more time with your family, or making decisions that are in the best interest of your family. If one of your beliefs is that everyone is deserving of respect, you might make choices that involve standing up for someone who is being treated unfairly.
It's not always easy to make choices that align with your values and beliefs, but it's important to try. When you make choices that are in line with what you believe in, you are living an authentic life.
If you're struggling to make choices that align with your values and beliefs, try identifying your authentic code! Your authentic code is a set of words that you live by, your values, that are true to YOU. It’s a way of gauging the actions that you’re taking, and making sure they are aligned with your authentic self.
Overcoming Obstacles to Authenticity
There are many obstacles that can stand in the way of authenticity. These obstacles can make it difficult to become aware of who you are, to accept yourself for who you are, and to live in alignment with your values and beliefs. Some common obstacles to authenticity include fear, doubt, and shame.
Our authentic selves are often hidden away, buried beneath years of conditioning and socialization. From a young age, we're taught to conform to certain standards and expectations. Either directly or indirectly, we're told what to like and what to dislike, how to behave and how to think. We're rewarded for conforming to expectations and punished for straying from the norm.
Over time, these messages start to shape our sense of self, causing us to lose touch with our true identities. We become afraid to express our true thoughts and feelings, for fear of rejection or judgement. We start to doubt ourselves, and question whether we are good enough. And we feel shame for the parts of ourselves that don't fit into society's mold.
As a result, we may find ourselves living inauthentic lives, disguising our true selves in order to fit in with the rest of society. Because of our past and the things we've been through, fear, doubt, and shame then become our biggest obstacles to authenticity.
Fear
Fear is a common obstacle to authenticity. We may fear rejection or abandonment, and so we build walls around ourselves to protect ourselves from hurt. This fear can prevent us from forming authentic connections with others, and it can also make it difficult to be honest with ourselves. Fear can prevent you from becoming aware of who you are, because it can cause you to avoid situations that might provide insight into your true self. Fear can also prevent you from accepting yourself for who you are, because it can cause you to focus on your flaws and imperfections. Fear can also prevent you from living in alignment with your values and beliefs, because it can cause you to avoid situations that might challenge your beliefs.
Doubt
Doubt is another common obstacle to authenticity. We doubt ourselves because somewhere in childhood we lost our sense of self worth. We may doubt our worthiness and fear that we will not be loved if we are honest about who we are. Doubt can prevent you from becoming aware of who you are, because it can cause you to second-guess yourself. Doubt can also prevent you from accepting yourself for who you are, because it can cause you to question your worth. Doubt can also prevent you from living in alignment with your values and beliefs, because it can cause you to second-guess your choices.
Shame
Shame is another common obstacle to authenticity, and may be the biggest obstacle standing in your way of becoming your true self. Shame is a feeling that we are not good enough, that we are unworthy of love and belonging. Shame is different than guilt, which is feeling bad about a specific behavior. Shame is a deep belief about ourselves. Shame is often created in childhood when events happen that send us the message that we are not good enough as we are, that we are not worthy of love and belonging.
As Brene Brown teaches, shame and authenticity cannot coexist.
Shame can prevent you from becoming aware of who you are, because it can cause you to avoid situations that might provide insight into your true self. Shame can also prevent you from accepting yourself for who you are, because it can cause you to focus on your flaws and imperfections. Shame can also prevent you from living in alignment with your values and beliefs, because it can cause you to avoid situations that might challenge your beliefs.
How to overcome fear, doubt, and shame so that you can align with your authentic self
Fear, doubt, and shame are just a few of the common obstacles to authenticity. If you're struggling to overcome these obstacles, there are a few things you can do.
First, try to become aware of when you're feeling fear, doubt, or shame. These emotions can be difficult to identify, but they can stand in the way of your authenticity. Once you're aware of when you're feeling these emotions, you can start to address them.
Second, try to understand where these emotions are coming from. Fear, doubt, and shame can often be rooted in our past childhood experiences. If you can understand where these emotions are coming from, you can start to work through them.
Finally, try to practice self-compassion. Fear, doubt, and shame can be difficult emotions to deal with, but you can't let them stop you from becoming your authentic self. Show yourself some compassion, and try to be gentle with yourself as you journey towards authenticity.
Tools for Staying Authentic
Part of living an authentic life is having tools to make sure you are staying authentic. This means that you have a plan in place for when you start to stray from your authentic self, or when you face challenges and obstacles. It's important to have a support system in place, and to know what your triggers are.
There are many tools you can use to help you stay authentic, but here are three powerful ones.
Self-awareness
In order to stay aligned with your authentic self, you need to practice self-awareness. This means being aware of your thoughts, emotions, and behaviors. It means being honest with yourself about your strengths and weaknesses. It means knowing what makes you happy and what doesn't.
When you're self-aware, it's easier to stay true to yourself because you'll be able to identify when you are veering off course and allows you to make corrections as needed. Self awareness is what allows you to make choices that are in line with your values and beliefs.
Additionally, it is important to be aware of your triggers – the things that cause you to act in a way that is not true to your authentic self. Once you are aware of your triggers, you can work on developing coping mechanisms so that you can avoid reacting in an inauthentic way.
There are many ways to increase your self-awareness, but one powerful way is to keep a journal. In your journal, you can write about your thoughts, feelings, and actions. You can also reflect on your day, and how you feel about the choices you made.
Writing in a journal is a great way to get to know yourself better. It's also a way to track your progress, and see how far you've come.
Another way to increase your self-awareness is to talk to someone you trust about your thoughts, feelings, and actions. This could be a friend, family member, therapist, or coach. Talking to someone else can help you gain insights into yourself that you might not have been able to see on your own.
Self-compassion
Self-compassion is another tool that can help you stay aligned with your authentic self. When you have self-compassion, you are kind and understanding towards yourself, even when you make mistakes.
One of the benefits of self-compassion is that it can help to prevent you from becoming too self-critical. When you're too self-critical, it's easy to get caught up in a cycle of negative thoughts. This can lead to anxiety and depression, and make it harder to make positive changes in your life.
Self-compassion can also help you to cope with difficult situations. When you're facing a challenge, self-compassion can help you to see the situation in a more positive light. It can also help you to feel motivated to make changes, rather than feeling overwhelmed or hopeless.
There are many ways to increase your self-compassion. One way is to practice mindfulness, as this can help you to be more present and aware of your thoughts and emotions. Another way is to be more accepting of your imperfections. Remember that everyone makes mistakes – it's part of being human.
Finally, try to treat yourself with the same kindness and understanding that you would give to a friend.
Mindfulness
Mindfulness is the practice of being present in the moment, and it can be a powerful tool for staying authentic. When you are mindful, you are aware of your thoughts, feelings, and actions. This awareness allows you to make choices that are in line with your values and beliefs.
To practice mindfulness, start by paying attention to your breath. Breathe in and out slowly, and focus on the sensations of your breath. Notice any thoughts or feelings that come up, and let them go. If you find your mind wandering, simply bring your attention back to your breath.
You can practice mindfulness anywhere, at any time. You can do it while you're brushing your teeth, walking to work, or even sitting in traffic. The more you practice mindfulness, the easier it will be to stay present and aware of your thoughts, feelings, and actions.
If you're new to mindfulness, there are many resources available to help you get started. There are also apps like Headspace and Calm that offer guided meditation.
Living an Authentic Life
What are some things I can do to live an authentic life?
- Get to know yourself. Spend time alone, and journal about your thoughts, feelings, and actions.
- Be accepting of yourself. Remember that everyone makes mistakes – it's part of being human.
- Live in alignment with your values and beliefs. Make choices that are in line with what you believe in.
- Be mindful of your thoughts, feelings, and actions. Pay attention to the present moment, and make choices that are in line with your authentic self.
- Treat yourself with kindness and understanding. Talk to yourself with the same compassion you would give to a friend.
- Set boundaries. Say no to things that don't align with your values or beliefs.
- Seek out relationships with like-minded people. Spend time with people who support and accept you for who you are.
- Be patient with yourself. It takes time to get to know your authentic self, and make choices that are in line with your values
What is the most important thing I can do to live an authentic life?
There are two important things to start becoming your true self and living an authentic life.
- Figure out who YOU are. Get to know yourself. Get to know all of the things that align with your authentic self.
- Set boundaries and say no to all of the things that do not align with your authentic self
If you can get into a groove implementing both of these steps into your life, you'll be well on your way to living an authentic life that is true to you.
For a deeper dive on how to find your authentic self so that you can live an authentic life, read How to Find Your Authentic Self.
What are some things I can do if I am struggling to live an authentic life?
Being your authentic self can be tough in a world that values conformity. If you are struggling to live an authentic life, it is important to seek help. There are many resources available to help you connect with your authentic self. Therapists can help you explore the parts of yourself that you have been hiding. Friends and family can provide support and understanding. And there are many books and articles that can offer guidance on the path to becoming your true self. The most important thing is to keep moving forward. Every step you take toward living an authentic life is a step in the right direction. Seek help when you need it, and never give up on yourself. You are worth it.
Conclusion
When we're children, we're constantly told who to be and how to behave. Over time, we learn to suppress our true selves in order to fit into society. As a result, we may find it difficult to be authentic later in life. We may feel like we're living someone else's life instead of our own.
However, it's never too late to reclaim our authentic selves. By exploring our true desires and learning to live in alignment with our values, we can start to create lives that are truly our own.
Living an authentic life can be challenging, but it's also incredibly rewarding.
When you live an authentic life, you become the best version of yourself. You are more confident, more resilient, and more fulfilled. Living authentically means being true to yourself, despite the obstacles. It means having the courage to be who you are, even when it's hard. It means living with intention and purpose. It means staying connected to your core values, even when the world is pulling you in different directions.
So ask yourself: What would it take for you to live as your authentic self? What steps can you take today to move in that direction? And most importantly, what is holding you back from becoming your true self?
If you’re ready to start learning about who you are authentically, our Self Love Kickstarter is perfect for you!
This 2 week guide provides everything you need to get started, including journal prompts, tips, and actionable steps. Throughout the workbook, you’ll find prompts encouraging you to embrace the things that align and detox that things that don’t align with you. By the end of the two weeks, you’ll have developed a deeper understanding of who you are – and boosted your self esteem and confidence in the process! So why wait? Kickstart the journey of aligning with your authentic self today with our Self Love Kickstarter!
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